Tomorrow is my brother-in-law's funeral. It is 2 degrees over night, and only 8 degrees and windy in the morning too. Wind chill will be minus 10 to 15 degrees tonight, and not much better tomorrow. It will be tough enough seeing Donald put in the ground tomorrow morning without having to put up with the freezing cold. Thirty years ago when my Dad died, it was bitter cold, and had 8 inches of snow the night before. Like Mother Nature was weeping to see good men leave the living years. It makes me revisit my own demise. I realize my time will come. Please LORD do not make it soon. At least Donald and my Dad did not suffer. My Mother died in her sleep. I hope when I leave these living years it will be quick and relatively painless. Us men do not do good with long and painful deaths. We are not as strong as women. Look what women go thru in childbirth. It would kill us men.
Yes I am depressed. I was not ready for Donald's or my father's passing. Mary and I would visit Donald and Shirley's every 5 or 6 weeks and go out to eat. Sometimes their younger brother's and their wives would join us for a meal, and we would sit at the restaurant and talk for a couple hours. It was good to see Mary enjoying herself. Appreciate what time you have with loved ones. You never know when it will be over. Yes I am depressed tonight, but it is not the usual down feeling I used to feel with my bi-polar problem. I will feel better again, I will miss a good friend who also was my brother-in-law. Yes the world will go on without Donald, but something will be missing. Every time the four of us got together there was a lot of laughing, especially about the hazards of growing old.
Donald is enjoying Heaven. My Dad is showing him the ropes. They are looking down on children. grand children, and soon great grand children. I hope I am good enough to make it to heaven and see them again. The reunion will be grand. But right now I have a lot to fill my living years. I know I will be going some day, but LORD please not too soon. I have a lot to accomplish yet!
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